| Why Don't Homeless People Go to Their Families For Help? |
Often people wonder why so many homeless don't just go their parents or
families for help. There are as many reasons as there are homeless.
families for help. There are as many reasons as there are homeless.
Many don't have parents or any other family to ask for help, even if they wanted to. For some
their parents have passed away, or are in such poor health or financial condition that they
can't help anyone. A survey indicated more than 25% of those homeless in the county I live in
(Pinellas FL) were over age 50. My parents passed away well over 20 years ago.
their parents have passed away, or are in such poor health or financial condition that they
can't help anyone. A survey indicated more than 25% of those homeless in the county I live in
(Pinellas FL) were over age 50. My parents passed away well over 20 years ago.
An increasing number of young homeless never had real parents. In some homes children are
treated as just a burden, being fed and housed but little more. Many are physically abused,
though verbal abuse can be just as destructive. Some parents have more time and money for
their purebred dogs and cats than for their children. Many parents are drug addicts and spend
their time and money supporting their addiction instead of caring for their children. Thousands
of young people run away from these conditions and end up living on the street.
treated as just a burden, being fed and housed but little more. Many are physically abused,
though verbal abuse can be just as destructive. Some parents have more time and money for
their purebred dogs and cats than for their children. Many parents are drug addicts and spend
their time and money supporting their addiction instead of caring for their children. Thousands
of young people run away from these conditions and end up living on the street.
Many homeless people may have several brothers and sisters, grown-up children, or other
relatives, but being family doesn't mean they will help. They may not be capable of helping,
due to their own health or financial situation. Some will only grudgingly help a little and make it
very clear that it's an unwelcome burden. Some will pretend not to even know these individuals
at all, putting on the facade that they have a perfect family and are models of high society. If
they think that even being seen talking to a homeless person may put their precious
reputation in jeopardy, they will say "I don't know you, go away". Perhaps later on someone of
a higher power will be telling them "I don't know you".
relatives, but being family doesn't mean they will help. They may not be capable of helping,
due to their own health or financial situation. Some will only grudgingly help a little and make it
very clear that it's an unwelcome burden. Some will pretend not to even know these individuals
at all, putting on the facade that they have a perfect family and are models of high society. If
they think that even being seen talking to a homeless person may put their precious
reputation in jeopardy, they will say "I don't know you, go away". Perhaps later on someone of
a higher power will be telling them "I don't know you".
From what I've experienced, I'm not at all surprised that some homeless people don't try to
seek help from their families. Sometimes a couple family members may help some, but then tell
the individual that they're not welcome and don't even deserve to be in the family.
Not long ago a family member said that I was luckier than him because my parents paid for my
education. It was just a small part of the on-going gossip in the family. In reality my parents
never paid anything, and I was continually told that I was too stupid to ever accomplish
anything in life. I went to a trade school anyway, paid for it on my own (by getting a student
loan), and found work on my own in spite of their hostility.
Many people are continually called stupid and worthless by their own families, discouraging
them from any progress. Many unfortunately begin to believe it, and end up homeless for a
lifetime thinking that there is no hope for them.
seek help from their families. Sometimes a couple family members may help some, but then tell
the individual that they're not welcome and don't even deserve to be in the family.
Not long ago a family member said that I was luckier than him because my parents paid for my
education. It was just a small part of the on-going gossip in the family. In reality my parents
never paid anything, and I was continually told that I was too stupid to ever accomplish
anything in life. I went to a trade school anyway, paid for it on my own (by getting a student
loan), and found work on my own in spite of their hostility.
Many people are continually called stupid and worthless by their own families, discouraging
them from any progress. Many unfortunately begin to believe it, and end up homeless for a
lifetime thinking that there is no hope for them.
Looking back on my own situation, I feel that I should have kept at a distance from my family
once I became self-sufficient, and stayed away. I may have had lingering doubts about doing
the right thing, but now realize that it would have been the best choice. Not realizing that at the
time, I tried to be part of a family that never wanted me and said that my birth was a mistake.
I've finally learned that sometimes it's better to distance yourself from those who hate you.
once I became self-sufficient, and stayed away. I may have had lingering doubts about doing
the right thing, but now realize that it would have been the best choice. Not realizing that at the
time, I tried to be part of a family that never wanted me and said that my birth was a mistake.
I've finally learned that sometimes it's better to distance yourself from those who hate you.
I read an article about a couple discovering a relative who was homeless and almost starving.
They welcomed him into their home and in time he went back to work. It's rare that families will
reach out and help their relatives like that. I certainly hope he's still doing well.
They welcomed him into their home and in time he went back to work. It's rare that families will
reach out and help their relatives like that. I certainly hope he's still doing well.
Many homeless people have separated themselves from whatever family they had for their
own reasons. While some well meaning people may try to reunite them with family, it's not
something for others to decide for them. People outside the family may not realize what's
really involved. Making a person go back to where they will be constantly ridiculed and made
to feel worthless doesn't help them get their life back together.
own reasons. While some well meaning people may try to reunite them with family, it's not
something for others to decide for them. People outside the family may not realize what's
really involved. Making a person go back to where they will be constantly ridiculed and made
to feel worthless doesn't help them get their life back together.
| Better a dry crust with peace and quiet than a house full of feasting and strife. Solomon, Proverbs 17:1 NIV |
Most homeless people may have parents, or a single parent, and perhaps brothers and
sisters. Even so they remain homeless on the street, struggling to just exist. Why then don't
they go to the family members and get some assistance?
sisters. Even so they remain homeless on the street, struggling to just exist. Why then don't
they go to the family members and get some assistance?
Many homeless men have wives, or ex-wives, and children which they are not allowed to see.
Even so they may be expected to pay child support. If they work and make some money, most
of it is taken away. Some have their drivers licences revoked too for not making child-care
payments, making it even harder to make enough to even support themselves.
Even so they may be expected to pay child support. If they work and make some money, most
of it is taken away. Some have their drivers licences revoked too for not making child-care
payments, making it even harder to make enough to even support themselves.
I have seen people, apparently family, yelling and swearing at each other in public and feel
very glad that I don't have to even live near them. Many people live in homes where there is
constant fighting and hostility. Being homeless is extremely difficult but not necessarily as bad
as living in some homes. Two guys who were brothers once invited me to stay with them. After
visiting and listening to about an hour of their drunken yelling I walked out and went back to
my camp in the woods. There is no way I could possibly live like they did.
very glad that I don't have to even live near them. Many people live in homes where there is
constant fighting and hostility. Being homeless is extremely difficult but not necessarily as bad
as living in some homes. Two guys who were brothers once invited me to stay with them. After
visiting and listening to about an hour of their drunken yelling I walked out and went back to
my camp in the woods. There is no way I could possibly live like they did.
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Comments? email me at:
clyde@homelessamerican.com
clyde@homelessamerican.com
There are times where the homeless person had been helped by parents but refused to
improve their own situation. Sometimes family members may just have to say no, if only for a
while, to give the person an incentive to try harder. I've recieved mail from parents that didn't
know what else they could do for their son who is homeless. He told his parents that he liked it
on the street. It may not be long before he realizes it's not so great.
improve their own situation. Sometimes family members may just have to say no, if only for a
while, to give the person an incentive to try harder. I've recieved mail from parents that didn't
know what else they could do for their son who is homeless. He told his parents that he liked it
on the street. It may not be long before he realizes it's not so great.
There are many reasons why homeless don't try to ask family for help, or have given up on
trying. While many people want easy answers about what they can do, it's not nearly that
simple. People are different, with many different problems and life situations. Many who are
homeless can be helped through programs that address issues on an individual basis, with or
without any family involvement.
trying. While many people want easy answers about what they can do, it's not nearly that
simple. People are different, with many different problems and life situations. Many who are
homeless can be helped through programs that address issues on an individual basis, with or
without any family involvement.
| homelessamerican.com |
| homelessamerican.com |